Schnapphund Podspringer

A little red dog
about the size of two oranges
follows you home.
                              It’s
an ugly looking thing
that could have escaped
from a cancer research laboratory
or fallen out of a novel
set among canal folk
on the Dnieper.
                          You
bring it in
and give it the tin of dog food
you were saving for hedgehogs,
and then, just out of interest,
go to your Wonderful World of Dogs book
and look up dogs with rat-like tails,
wrinkled brows, double chins,
smoking pipes and wearing
sailor hats.
                  To your delight
you find that, without doubt,
it’s a pure bred Schnapphund Podspringer,
worth its weight (8.5 ounces)
in gold.

You look at the Schnapphund Podspringer
and the Schnapphund Podspringer looks at you,

then an accordian is produced
and one or other of you goes out for a bottle of whisky.